her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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