he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Randomize
