Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I need moral support for this bender
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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