Little spoons don't ask big questions
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
