I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Randomize
