i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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