what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
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Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
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I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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