this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Randomize
