i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize