i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
