I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Of course I have a pirate flag
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
