Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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