So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
