I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
you would pick up someone in the library
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I want to ride his face like a jet ski