My nipple is on Facebook.
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
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