Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize