Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
