I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
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I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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