Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
