Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Randomize
