Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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