so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
