Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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