How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
