halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize