O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
