ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I'm at about main and main street
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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