actually, I'm a sock model
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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