Me too!
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
