I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Banned from zoo.
Again?
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Randomize
