goodnight i made you a song goodbye
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction