If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I have tasted many bathrooms
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize