Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
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