With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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