Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
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