You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Randomize
