this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize