My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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