My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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