So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
