My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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