U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize
