i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
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