piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Randomize
