I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
The cops high fived after they tackled you
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
