That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize