If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
