I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
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