The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
His hands were made for my vagina.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Randomize
