Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
It's blow job season.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Well I just put wine in my tea
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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