i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
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